


Inhibitions

by Elliot_S_Roy, robin_X3



Category: Death Note (Anime & Manga)
Genre: 5+1 Things, Drunk Light, Drunken Shenanigans, Fluff, Humor, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-24
Updated: 2021-01-12
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:00:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,197
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27173473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elliot_S_Roy/pseuds/Elliot_S_Roy, https://archiveofourown.org/users/robin_X3/pseuds/robin_X3
Summary: Aka 5 times Light Yagami was drunk (and 1 time he wasn’t)
Relationships: L/Yagami Light
Comments: 10
Kudos: 114





	1. i

**Author's Note:**

> This story was initially supposed to be a single 800 word chapter of [Aishiteru](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24342016) but then [Elliot ](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elliot_S_Roy) said 'ssup.

The first time Light came in contact with alcohol, he’d been too young to really realize he was  _ inebriated. _

His parents had been talking in hushed voices just out of earshot in the kitchenette, and he had been hungry. He had tried calling them once, but they had sounded very excited about whatever it was that they had been conspiring about.

Annoyed at being left out of the loop, and his ego a little hurt that they’d think he couldn’t keep a secret, he had decided to climb up on the chair all by himself and get his own food. He had reached for the large dish-full of scrumptious-looking freshly fried dumplings, and had taken a giant bite of it.

The spices had hit his tongue then, and his eyes had started to water.

Blinded by the spice-induced tears, he had reached for the glass closest to him, which happened to be his father’s half-finished glass of champagne. His father wasn’t one to drink much- but it seemed like they were celebrating something that day, something they weren’t ready to tell him yet. He was annoyed that they wouldn’t trust him with whatever it is they were hiding from him.

(He would later find out it was the fact that his mother was pregnant with Sayu, and they had decided to let him know once she’d reached the stable period.) 

But for the time being, he was cross with them, and he hid the light buzz he felt, tried to climb the stairs up to his room, tripped, scraped his ankle, and… ashamed as he was to admit it, started to cry.

They’d both come running to him then, and he’d been picked up by his father then, and it still is one of his most precious memories- him sitting on his father’s lap while he rubbed his back comfortingly, his mother tending to his bleeding knee, and him trying to look anywhere else except at them out of guilt. 

It was also the first time he’d heard of L. 

Because as he sat there, sniffling back his tears of shame, he’d chanced upon the news- one of the most unsolvable, practically dead murder cases, had just been solved. What was more surprising, was that it was solved by a mysterious detective whose name, identity, even nationality no one knew of, someone who went by the name of _“Eru.”_ (L) 

He found himself thinking it was pretty cool.

He wondered if he’d ever have the chance to meet this Eru, if they would get along, if he could ask him how to find out secrets like the ones your parents were hiding from you.


	2. iii

The third time Light ended up drunk was at his high school graduation after party. 

His "friends" had arranged it to celebrate the fact that they’d all been accepted into universities or career paths of their choice, and just wanted to let loose and party. Light's mother had practically forced him to go and socialise because she was afraid he was becoming a hikikomori, doing nothing but staying cooped up studying at home all day, or going to cram school. He'd even stopped (pretend-) dating girls because of the surveillance the police had on him due to the Death Note suspicions 

He’d made sure to leave Ryuk behind because, frankly, he needed a break from his constant inane and intrusive questions.

Needless to say, Light hadn't realized what "a fun little party to let loose" really meant. The dim rooms and vivid lighting and loud music made him disoriented in under half an hour after he'd set foot into the establishment. 

Light shook his head to try to clear his head. The room was packed with people and smelled like an awful mixture of sweat, deodorant and air fresheners. He squeezed through the crowd and headed for the refreshments table lining one side of the hall. 

Considering all the refreshment options for a minute, he poured himself a glass of the most innocuous looking item there- the fruit punch, and chugged it all in one go. He was parched.

Someone from the crowd, quite possibly one of his ex-classmates who considered themself to be one of his best friends, called for him on stage, with a request to give a farewell speech.

Light, always a fan of being in the limelight, couldn’t decline. 

He shuffled on stage, chalking up his disoriented vision to the blinding lights, took the mic, and let loose. “Hey!!!!” The crowd chanted his name, and that  _ really  _ boosted his ego. “My buddy here,” he pointed backstage, “Told me to get on stage and _ let loose _ . But let me just say- I just got admitted to To-Oh university after a very rigorororous exam, and frankly, I’m fucking tired. Do I really have to?”

The audience crowed, whooped and applauded, and only then did he realize what he’d done. Light smiled like he’d intended to say this all along, countering with a “Let’s get this party started!!!!” and handed the mic over, biting his bottom lip, and making a hasty exit.

He  _ messed up _ .

He hadn’t meant to say all that out loud.

Light Yagami was perfect. Light Yagami **never** _messes up_.

**_Why_ ** did he say that?

Was he… there was alcohol in that fruit punch! Of course! 

He bumped into someone in his hurry to escape through the back exit inconspicuously, and even though he knew if he spoke any more, he suffered the risk of embarrassing himself further, he realized it was only polite that he apologise.

“Sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going.” Light tipped his head a little in apology, his vision swimming, which he regretted immediately.

The stranger steadied him with an arm on his shoulder. “It’s alright,” they said in a quiet monotone. This person, they were so close, Light could see the multicoloured disco lights reflect clearly off their blackhole black irises. If he stared any longer, he feared he would be sucked right into the void. 

Light realized he was staring for an uncomfortably long time. “Yeahhhh.” He slurred in reply.

“You seem to be drunk. Come on.” The other person said, and Light followed him, teetering only very slightly. The other man called him a cab and helped him get in, and Light noted the pleasant smell of fresh, lemony detergent, and a very light, masculine musk. “I’ll have to ask him what deodorant that is.” Light found himself thinking.

“I’m not wearing any deodorant.” The stranger replied, laughing silently. 

“Oh. I said that out loud, didn’t I?” Light felt the heat in his cheeks, and sank into the seat behind him. “Thanks.”

“Get home safe, Light kun.” The other man replied, closing the door. 

As the taxi turned the corner and the man disappeared from his sight, Light regretted not asking him his name. He seemed nice. He knew Light’s name without him even introducing himself. Such a nice guy! Light would’ve liked to be friends with him, if only he could remember his face too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No, I didn't forget 2. xD
> 
> For those of you wondering: Mysterious stranger IS L.


	3. iv

Misa was being exceptionally obnoxious that day.

Don’t get him wrong- Misa is moderately annoying most of the time, even when she’s not trying. And Light is usually okay with that- it’s just the type of person she is. He chose his poison- he had, for some obscure reason he can’t, for the life of him, remember now, decided to date her, of all people. He was nothing if not a man of his word.

But today, she was really testing him, being particularly insistent.

“It’s our anniversary Light kun!” Misa whined, latching on to his arm.

“It hasn't been a year yet Misa.” Light sighed, gently extracting his arm from between her bosom.

“Nooo, you silly billy. It’s been one-fourth of a year! Our relationship is 3 months young today!” Misa cheered. “Let’s go celebrate!” 

Light looked to L, sending silent SOS signals with his eyes, but L pointedly avoided looking their way, stirring sugar cube upon sugar cube into his already syrup-thick tea.

Light sighed. He would have to deal with this himself.

“Misa, I …”

“Yay I knew it! I knew you’d come around.” She whirled to L then, index finger raised as if scolding a petulant child, and _threatened_ the World’s Greatest Detective, “NO.PEEPING!”

While Light stood there, mouth open in shock and surprise, because it takes _balls_ to stand up to one of the most powerful men on Earth, and _damn_ , he should take note to never piss of women, Misa took advantage of his statue-like stature, pulling him by the arm out of the investigative quarters with strength she shouldn’t even possess.

Fast forward to 2 hours of Misa talking his ears off about matters he didn’t give two shits about, while simultaneously feeding him random food items that he only paid half attention to, and resorting to drinking whatever suspicious bitter liquid that she kept pouring for him, which burned as it went down, their date was finally over.

Light stood up, ready to take his leave, and sat back down immediately.

His legs were jelly.

“Light kunnn where are you going? The night is still young.” Misa’s voice was too loud, and too close. There were fingers caressing his face, carding through his hair. 

His face felt flush, but the feeling felt foreign to him. He wasn’t sure he liked it either. “Misa, it’s late. I should go..” He gripped her on the shoulders, trying to push her away gently, without seeming forceful, but his arms, like his legs, lacked the little strength he needed to do so. 

Misa was practically on his lap now. 

_Uh oh._ His brain provided helpfully. He didn’t see this ending well. Misa was even closer now, her scent overpowered his senses, and he could tell each individual eyelash extension apart from her natural ones. He closed his eyes. “Misa, no…” He warned quietly, his throat dry.

There was a whirlwind of movement, and then he was leaning on someone noticeably less-softer than Misa, much taller than Misa, and smelled not of overwhelmingly sweet flowers, but more like detergents and rain and something pure and soothing that was distinctly-

“L?” Light rasped.

“Can you stand, Light kun?” L’s rough baritone voice ruffled the hair beside his ear, and Light found that he didn’t mind.

“Mmm, with support, I think.”

“Where are you taking him?” Misa whined, jealousy dripping poison from her words alone. It seemed she was blocking the exit, determined to not let Light leave.

“Move.” L bit out through clenched teeth, and his hold on Light grew almost painful.

Light shivered. L always spoke in monotone, or in that fake-cheery voice of his reserved only to annoy Light. This was different. He’d never heard L sound so.. cold and angry before. 

As they finally escaped that suffocating room, and climbed into the lift, Light let out a deep sigh, thinking that as a person who never really drank alcohol, his experiences so far were far from pleasant- it was only his 4th time, and he felt like swearing off of alcohol completely.

"It would be wise, Light kun." L replied, and Light realized he'd thought out loud. 

He sagged against L, unable to stand up straight any more. L allowed him to lean against him, and the moments passed without them saying anything to each other. Light wanted to thank him, or maybe apologise for the trouble, but didn’t- there was something pure and precious right here, and he didn’t want to ruin the peaceful balance. So he stayed quiet, basking in the shared body-heat, and breathing in L’s scent. He didn’t know why, but L reminded him of home. 


	4. v

“Aaah Light kun!” Too late. 

Light chugged the whole glass empty, putting it down with a loud  **THUD** , and looked at L with a single quirked eyebrow.

“You... weren't supposed to drink that.” L said carefully.

“But it's just ‘ _ soda _ ,” Light quoted mockingly, and hiccupped. Then, uncharacteristically, instead of being embarrassed, he started giggling at himself.

_ Uh oh _ . L thought, but said, “It isn't. I lied.”

“L is a liar! I knew it.” Light clapped his hands loudly, too jovial at his newfound discovery.

_ He was already drunk! _

Just as L had thought. Light wasn't legally old enough to be drinking, at least according to Japanese laws. It only figures that being a stickler for rules, Light had had little to no experience with alcohol, so even a little was enough to make him tipsy. 

And this misplaced glass of strong zero- that L had claimed to be concentrated apple juice, and Light argued it was something else, had led to a massive (childish) argument. At the end of which, Light, in an attempt to prove L wrong, had ended up drinking all of the wine. 

L sighed. “Let’s get you to bed, Light kun.”

“Mmhmm, of course, you want to  _ bed  _ **_me_ ** .”

“Boop.” Light aimed for L’s nose  **after** he said the world, giving L plenty of time to dodge the incoming attack on his nose. 

Light pouted.  _ He missed! _

“You’re a bad boy. Momma said don’t go to bed with bad boys…….” Light batted his eyes at L. “Not before marriage.”

The detective looked scandalized. “Light kun isn't even old enough to drink. I can't possibly take advantage of you.” 

L lifted the younger man up from his crumpled half-lying-half-sitting slouch on the couch. Light held on to L by the shoulders, barely standing on unsteady feet, and L wrapped his arms around his waist to steady him. There was a flush on Light’s cheeks the cause of which neither of them could be sure of- was it because of alcohol or because of their proximity?

“You'd only be talking advantage of me if I was unwillingling.” Light slurred.

_ No. Nope. No way. Oh hell NO OHMYGODYES _ L’s brain said. “You're not thinking straight.” L’s mouth said.

“You silly man.” Light booped him again, and L didn’t fight it this time. If his nose was now cherry-red, he could blame it on Light. 

Light giggled at his successful attempt this time. “Of course I’m not thinking  _ straight _ ! We’re both guys!”

“Light kun, you know what I’m talking about.” L fought to maintain his deadpan, as he nudged Light to lie down on the bed. The struggle from the sitting room to the bedroom made him feel like he was running a marathon while lugging a squirmy, sugar-high child that kept trying to run away, and L regretted buying such a big hotel for the task force. A small LDK* would’ve been just fine!

Light looked like he would go down without a fight.  _ Good _ , L thought, and moved to turn off the lamp. 

He thought wrong.

“Yessss too much talk let's get to businesssss!” Light held on to L by the shoulders and **pulled** . L barely stopped himself from falling on top of Light, only managing to brace himself by grabbing on to the headboard on either side of Light’s head at the last minute.

“Okay that is quite enough!” L wrapped the chains of their handcuffs around Light, immobilising him (and his grabby hands which were inching too close to L’s butt for his sanity).  _ This was too much! _ He couldn’t take any more of this! It was too much for his brain and his heart. 

“L…” Light attempted to embrace him, thinking L had put his arms around him in a hug (his brain’s processing speed had been reduced considerably) but got confused at the restricted movement. __

_ “Oh!” _ He gasped, finally noticing the chains. “I don't think I'm into bondage. But if it's for you L, I'll do  _ anything _ .” Light went for a kiss.

His lips met L’s palm. “Light kun. No.”

There was a definitive pause. L let loose a sigh.

“You say I'm old enough to murder thousands of people but you won’t even let me kiss you!” Light sounded angry. 

“Is Kira controlling you?” L asked, a little scared. There was no way Light was… Light would never answer truthfully when he was sober. There’s a high chance he wouldn’t remember this in the morning. L had to know. He had to know if all of  _ this _ , this provocative proclamation, basically a  **_confession_ ** , was real or not.

For some reason, the mention of Kira seemed to sober him up.

Light blinked, as if finally aware of his surroundings, or maybe the present company, or the current situation. 

“L..” There was an odd gloom in his eyes, the previous flirty lilt completely gone from his voice, “If he is, then this is a present before my final farewell.” He went for a kiss again, leaving enough space for L to meet him or to move away.

L planted a chaste kiss on Light’s forehead. “Good night, Light kun.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (*LDK=Living, Dining and Kitchen area. It's commonly used to describe apartment or real estate sizes in Japan.)
> 
> I had too much fun writing this chapter xD  
> Thanks for reading!


	5. ii

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys. It's been a while. Enjoy this chapter. It's a bit different from the rest :)

Light Yagami had done something- _Abhorring._ **Amazing.** _Atrocious._

He had killed _. _

Light Yagami had used the Death Note to  **_kill_ ** a person.

His victim was someone truly horrid- a pervert, a sexual deviant who was about to rape a woman along with his team of goons. 

So Light had done society a favour by ridding it of him.

He’d always known that he would be a police officer- fight crime and take down bad guys. He knew that if he followed such a career path, he would eventually have to get his hands dirty. He would have to convict criminals, condemn them for their crimes, and in extreme cases, he would end up having to shoot someone. 

However, knowing that was in theory was not the same as experiencing it himself. 

Light could still hear the crash loud in his clear in his head- the screech of metal against metal as the incoming truck collided with the bike head on, the sickening bone crunching noise echoing off the surrounding walls as Light’s kill got into the accident that he’d orchestrated. 

Sweat gathered on his brows, and a single drop trickled down the side of his face excruciatingly slow, testing his patience. On the one hand, he wanted to wipe it off. But he also feared what he would find if he did: if he touched his face with his guilty hands, would his hands come off crimson? Would he discover his face painted red with the blood of his victim?

_ Oh God, he’d killed _ **_a person_ ** _! _

Light was hyperventilating now.

He scurried into the alleyway beside him, and threw up violently into the dumpster.

He spent long, agonizing minutes puking out his lunch. 

His mind couldn’t take the shock of having taken a life, that too with his very own hands.

He had  _ judged  _ a man- deemed him unsalvageable, worthy of death- on the basis of his own ethics.

How could he do that? 

Who is he to decide who lives, and who dies?

Light heaved again, but his stomach was empty. 

He needed to go home. Go home to his room and lie down on his bed and sleep and hopefully this will all be a fever dream and he’ll have woken up to no blood on his hands and no weight of the Death Note in his bag. 

But he couldn’t go home like this- panicking and out of his mind and reeking of vomit.

_ Home _ . What would his mother think? Her perfect son was a murderer. And his sister? How could she look up to him after what he’d done? And his justice-loving, law-abiding father? He’d be devastated to see him like this.

No, he couldn’t go home now. 

God, he needed a drink.

Wiping his mouth on his napkin and throwing it away, Light picked himself up and trudged out of the alley, heading towards the seedy looking bar at the end of the road. He needed something strong- to wash all of this down and out of his mind.

There were no bouncers or guards at the entrance- all the better for him. The teen entered the dimly lit room, and took a seat at one of the bar stools just off centre, closest to the exit but not so close that it seemed suspicious.

The bartender- a lanky, tall man with wild hair that was tied into a messy ponytail and wearing thick-rimmed, nerdy glasses, approached him with a frown. “ID?”

Attempting to act confident despite how he felt like the world was constricting around him, he brought it out from his wallet- a fake ID he’d made as a self-project when he was bored out of his mind on a mind-numbingly boring weekend- and showed it to the bartender, praying he wouldn’t get called out on his bluff. The bartender matched his face to the picture in the ID, shrugged, and returned it. “What can I get for you?”

“What’s good here?” Light asked, sounding more confident than he felt.

  
  


Light hadn’t kept a count of how many drinks he’d downed since coming here- looking at the array of empty glasses in front of him, he hoped he had enough money in his wallet to take a cab home after paying his bills. 

“I’ve been drinking all this and yet I don’t feel tipsy. Why is that, Me Bartender?”

“It’s a spritz. It has very low alcohol content.” The bartender put away the glasses he’d been wiping with an exaggerated flourish. “And it also helps in digestion.” He added on, the slightest wrinkle on the tip of his nose.

Light sniffed himself, and made an overdramatic gagging expression. “Very conniving. Getting me drunk without really getting me drunk. What are you, a lawyer?”

“Mikami Teru. I’m studying to be a prosecutor. So you’re not too far off the mark” The bartender reached his hand forward in a handshake.

Light shook his hands once. “Asahi Yamazaki.” Light introduced, according to his fake ID.

“Had a rough night, Yamazaki san?”

“Well you know how things get, the corporate grind.” Light shrugged to get rid of non-existent kinks on his shoulder, faking the posture of an overworked salaryman. “It’s like I’m trapped in a cage, like a hamster on an exercise wheel, running around and around, going in circles, and for what?” Light felt his true feelings start to seep out, the alcohol’s effect loosening his tongue more than he’d like, and took a swig of his bitter, fruity drink to stop his rambling. “I guess I just needed to do something that would make me feel like I could escape from this before I rotted away too.”

Mikami nodded, seemingly satisfied with the answer.

Their attention was drawn to the intro chime on TV displaying the evening news. Death. Rape. Murder. War. Fraud. Theft. Nothing but negativity. Signs of rot in society.

_ “..with the help of the world famous detective L, the police have finally captured the criminal behind the violent string of deaths. The perpetrator’s identity is undisclosed…” _

“What’d they do?” A guy sitting two seats away from Light asked their drinking partner.

“You don’t know?” The person beside them exclaimed. “That guy went around chopping off dicks of rapists who didn’t get convicted due to lack of evidence!” “Whaaat? Why? He’s the one who served justice!”

“But you can’t just go about killing people!” One of the patrons slammed their glass on the table in their excitement, spilling their drink everywhere.

“Why not?” Their friend spoke up. “These rapists would’ve gone around free to do whatever they wanted. He did a good thing by getting rid of scum.”

“But if you kill a killer, the number of killers remains the same.” Light goaded them on, half out of amusement, and half out of guilt- after all, he’d been unable to get rid of these same thoughts since he’d obtained the Death Note.  _ And then he’d gone and killed- _

“Not if you kill more than one!” One of the younger guys said, clinking beer mugs with his friend.

“He’s a hero, is what I say.” One of the guys on the other table exclaimed, and the bar filled with discordant murmurs about the ethics of killing.

Light spent some time listening to the chatter around him- it never failed to amuse him to observe other humans, and their thoughts and ideologies. The shallowness of the discussion however, made him shake his head. “As a prosecutor, what do you think of that?” He asked at length, expecting some smart conversation from a learned individual. 

(Whether or not he expected some ease of mind, some closure, after what he’d done just an hour ago, by talking to another person- he’d dissect these feelings later, in the safety of his home. )

Mikami looked at Light as if he hadn’t expected such a question. “Well,” he said, taking a moment to gather his thoughts. “I agree.”

“That’s surprising.” Light sat up straighter. “I’d expected you to condemn it. After all, the perpetrator wasn’t found guilty. So doesn’t that make them innocent?”

“It doesn’t matter whether they can be proven guilty or not. They committed the crime, and they deserve punishment.” The bartender put the beer mug down with more force than necessary. “Now if the court is too weak to punish the criminal, then someone had to do it for them.  _ Noblesse oblige _ .”


End file.
